DAR Dating: Removing Your Ex From Social Media

By @CurlsAndSports 

You've been there before, right? You post the most beautiful selfies with your boyfriend or girlfriend and then in the matter of seconds (because that what it feels like), you two break up. It'll be alright and life will go on. It just wasn't meant to be. What's next? Time to remove all those photos. I'm here to help you do this strategically because we don't want people talking smack about you although that's inevitable. How can you seriously remove photos without people noticing? I got this down pact because like you, I was there once before.

The first thing many people tell you to do is to don't... don't post photos of your significant other online. Why? For these exact reasons. People remember when you dated so and so. You also don't want to give them any explanations because they're no one important. But because I've been there, here's where I would start: think of a strategic time where no one is up and remove your relationship status on Facebook to the feature where only you can see it. Trust me, no one can see that you're listing yourself as single. Since we're in 2016, chances are, you're on other social media platforms. Time is everything when you're trying to delete this person.

Let's move to Instagram.

How can you possibly bring yourself to removing that terrific couple selfie you took at the Yankee World Series back in 2009? You can and will. The thing to remember here is to not delete all the photos in one shot. This will require you to go all the way back to the selfies that weren't even in the relationship stage. It's up to you if you want to delete it, but feel free to do so. How would I do it? I would delete a few photos at a time and then just replace them with selfies or memes. It's all about strategy and how you choose to map this out.

There are more ways to be technical with Instagram too. Make sure you check your tagged photos and attempt to remove yourself. Your friends may or may not have some couple selfies up but if they do, kindly ask them to remove it because quite frankly, you don't want to see that shit anyway.

If you're looking to keep this as private as possible, don't be petty and post ridiculous quotes about "life going on" or "trust no one." They're bullshit at the end of the day and it makes no sense why anyone should like these posts. I have an issue with the like button because you shouldn't be liking the fact that you can't trust no one. It also brings uncomfortable questions that are followed by unnecessary DMs from creeps who have been lurking on your profile since day 1.

Like Shakespeare once said, "To be or not to be, that is the question." In our case, to unfollow or to keep on following, that is the question. This is left to your discretion. One would like to think that you can remain online friends but fact of the matter is, it's only a matter of time til you see them with someone new. How can you handle that? My advice? Lurk from the shadows. I wouldn't want to follow them because ultimately, I'm not going to like their new couple selfie because then comparisons will arise. It's a sticky situation and before you get stuck there, unfollow.

Thankfully you don't have to worry about the removal of an ex on Twitter because in that magical land, no one cares if you're in a relationship or not. This is yet another reason why I love Twitter.

I keep stressing time for a reason. Only you know when you're ready to remove this person from your social media platforms. It doesn't matter if you choose to do it in the spur of the moment and delete everything all at once or take a month to begin the healing process. You gotta give these things time.

Since the majority of things are saved somewhere else, what are you going to do when you mistakenly glance upon a photo of your ex in your email? It's alright to pause, think, but no need to reminisce. You'll start thinking about the relationship and there's no need for that. That doesn't mean that the relationship didn't mean anything to you. It did make you happy at one point, but you're just simply done with that chapter of your life.

If there's a lesson to be learned here, it's to not go OD (in case you don't know what this means, overdose or go over the limit) on the couple photos for your next relationship. Save it for special occasions and perhaps random photos. People like to be caught off guard. A good stalker will pay attention and lurk beyond belief. Also people hate those constant couple selfies. No one gives a flying fuck that you guys attended a lame paint night event that you purchased on Groupon or that he or she "spoils you. Enough is enough. Keep things in moderation and your relationship private and you'll not have to worry about much of these things. However, if you do keep things rather public and it has fallen apart, I hope this helped you in the process.



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